It appears that your are doing a great deal of spiritual exploration & reflection, and you are using this forum to express what you are finding. That’s perfectly appropriate. No need to apologize. You have turned toward RastafarI and as you explore your heart (which I know is good & considerate from your earlier posts) you are naturally finding more and more of JAH’s Love within (i.e., the Love that gives life, protects and sustains like a pure, flowing stream).
I don’t know if you are consulting a Bible or not, but regardless the conclusions you arrive at reflect the Wisdom and Teachings of His Majesty Haile Selassie I and Jesus Christ. Love is the weapon against which evil by design has no defense. “Hold no grudges, only love can pure the wickedness away” is Wisdom that harmonizes perfectly with that of H.I.M. who said, “We must live in peace with our former colonisers, shunning recrimination and bitterness and forswearing the luxury of vengeance and retaliation, lest the acid of hatred erode our souls and poison our hearts.”
The weather is profound. In a world where many have substituted science for the real-eyes-ation that JAH is the Creator of everything, weather has become nothing more than a series of meteorological events defined by a set of physical forces (which men presume to understand, but do not); the Hand of JAH in the miracle of rain or a ray of sunshine has been eliminated from the consciousnesses of so many.
JAH speaks to us, Rasmi. You clearly have ears to hear and are listening. Keep doing so. You are His precious child and JAH will never deceive you or steer you wrong.