When I was first dating across the lines of the trinity-oneness schism in Orthodoxy, I had a psychic sensation or intuitive perception of thought cross my mind that my then girlfriend was saying "I hate you". She said it with so much love in her voice that I knew it meant "I love you". It was as pure a reflection as I could imagine and I didn't know if it came from I or from She.
I'd like to draw your attention to two books from the States, both written by two different Afro-American women,
"I Hate Black Women", by T.C. Writer
"Don't Bring Home a White Boy: And Other Notions That Stop Black Women From Dating Out", by Karyn Langhorne Folan
These might be old hat now, but I'd be interested in the reasonings on them both of anyone who read them.